What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

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Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

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Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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