Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Anti jokes are funny

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +43

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's funny? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q How do you make pie. A You cook it

thumb_up thumb_down +25

your moms so fat she has kankles

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a tree on fire? A burning tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops