What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

Dead girls can't say no.

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

How Do You Fart Eat Beans

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

Women's rights.

What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

Detroit has a low crime rate

What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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