Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

I like that, but why am I happy?

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

A black man and a mexican jump off a building at the same time, who lands first? Who cares?

What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

knock knock... ...no answer

Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

This is just like Facebook. If you guys want to like comments, or even comment on them, just get Facebook.

Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

one stop shop

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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