Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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Q: what happens to the black guy that walks into the bar. A: He walk in ,gets a drink, and leaves

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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Why are there so many jokes about people walking into bars? Bars are known as a place most people go to for a social occasion, making them a place that most people can relate with.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

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wuts at the end of the world? nothing the earth is spherical and therefore does not have an end

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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yo momma is so stupid she went to the beach and the whales song " dooooooonnn't stop. belieeeeving. wwwwwhoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOA"

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What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

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How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

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Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

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How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

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There was a buffalo on a farm. The buffalo was slaughtered and then put and a package and sent to people who like the taste of slaughtered, chemical filled buffalo. In other words, people who like buffalo wings.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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Two robots are walking down the street together and walk into a bar. Just kidding, they can't walk because they have Polio.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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