Two ducks are in a pond. The one duck asks, "Can you pass the soap?" The other duck says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?"

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There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

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Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

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Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

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One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

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Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

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the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

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youre gay

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

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Ben is gay

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Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

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Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

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A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

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to see a bad joke look above

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops