A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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Jennifer walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender's name was Steven. His friend's sister who was my cousin's ex wife has the same name as the girl Jennifer. That's what I heard.

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

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If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

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dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

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a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

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i am 26 why was i kidnapped 13 years ago cause i was in a badly written play

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

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What do you say to a horse at the vet? Good god, look at that ear infection.

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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How can you tell that the Filipino presidential candidate Grace Poe is an alien? From her extra set of retractable jaws and highly acidic body fluids.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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roses are red and violets are blue so is your mums fanny

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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I read the terms of service.

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The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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