If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? finding a half worm.

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

haw are alligators and turtles simaler? They are both reptiles and carnavores and their speaces goes all the way back to the dinosoar ages

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

DERP

What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

What do you call your mother? Mom.

Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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