What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

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Why did the asbestos cross the road? Because it was being removed from an elementary school due to the fact that asbestos is an air pollutant which is regulated under section 112 of the Clean Air Act of 1970.

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

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Y u do dis?

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what didn't Jon go to the movies? He tripped and broke his neck and cant look up

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"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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What do you call a dog without a bone? Floppy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops