A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

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A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Everything's brown Who shit on my flowers

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How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

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What's funny? Nick Sotelo

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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Your're racist.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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Do you want to hear some bad news? My wife just died Do you want to hear some good news? I'm single

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops