roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So one time there was this woman learning...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q. Whats Red and yellow and has braces? A.Pierre-Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops