Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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Hail Hitler

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what did the brick say to the other brick? hello. the guy next to the bricks was shocked and went home and killed his wife then later higherd an indian man to give him a lapdance.

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Thats malarious! When something is so funny that... malaria

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What's white and has a crusty nose? Luke Lange

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supe- oh wait it is a plane

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An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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A man said to his friend that he looks like his mom died. the other man started to cry due to the fact that it was acctually his dad

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What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

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What happened to the chicken when it crossed the road? Nothing because the cars that almost hit it swerved off the road.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

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A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops