What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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how do you get an A in a class? idk never got on.

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

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A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

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What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

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What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

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What did the apple say to the Banana? ....Nothing... fruit don't talk

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A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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have you ever had african food? neither have they

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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A pope meets another one

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Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

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What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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