What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

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What did the shark say to the boat captain? So do you prefer cards or pool?

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12 in general

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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How high is the sky? True or False

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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3 blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The 1 blonde says they're deer tracks. The 2 blonde says they're elk tracks. The 3 blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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An IRS agent named Harold Crick finds that he has the ability to hear a narrator comment on every moment of his life. He later becomes institutionalized in the Schizophrenic ward.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops