How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

What happend to the dude who couldnt fart He blew up

What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

Oooh. That fish smells delicious.

What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

a boy jumps through a mirror and out a window then he fell so now he's dead.

How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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