A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Knock knock Go away

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How do you get a blonde with one hand out of a tree? Grab a ladder and carry her down.

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

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Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

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rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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homosexual rights to marriage

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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add me on facebook guys , im sexy , i get mad girls and guys, im bisexual , and im a blood (the gang) http://www.facebook.com/brock.beatty.1?ref=ts

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Two Black men, one wearing a blue shirt, and one wearing a red shirt, Jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The one in the blue shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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