Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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99% of guys are hot. The other 1% go to my school.

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

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whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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My life

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? the pizza wont scream when you put it in the oven.....

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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Women's Rights...

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Yo mama is stupid that she has an IQ below 70 and can be classified as mentally retarded.

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So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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