What do you call your mother? Mom.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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Laura Pratz..

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apple pie.

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

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Roses are red Violets are blue

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noodles

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To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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The

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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P0P T4Rt

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How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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Hair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

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Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

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Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops