#IHateHashtags

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you call five mexicans pushing a truck up a hill? Five mexicans stuck in the middle of nowhere looking for an auto mechanic.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

An epileptic man attends a rave.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock, Knock... Whose there? No one... you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a bar and orders two shots the bartender then picks up his shotgun and gives it to him

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops