Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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So a bar walks into a man...

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What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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What is better than tissues? Correct!

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A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

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The Labour Party.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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Whats green and smells like bacon................. Green bacon

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops