Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

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roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

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women's rights.

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what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

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Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

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Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

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Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

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Chlamydia

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

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Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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A hill billy went fishing

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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