What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

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Why do skinny women eat their food fresh cooked? So that they don't contract food-borne diseases and risk dying.

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Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

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Q: Why was the man eating his foot? A: Because he was a part of the circus.

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Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

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"MR PLATT!!!!!!" "Yeah?" "Telephone for you sir." "Oh, cheers Tony."

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This guy gets on a plane and leaves he takes a bite of a green Apple and says to sower then he takes a bite out of a red Apple and says to sweet so he takes a bite of a gernade and says to crunchy so the plane lands and he walks past a little boy crying and says little boy why are you crying because a green Apple came down and hit my dog in the head so he's walking along and sees a nether boy crying and says little boy why are you crying cause a red Apple came down and hit me on the head so he's walking along abd sees a little girl laughing little girl he says why are you laughing cause I farted and the building be hind me bluw up lol ????

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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If life gives you lemonade.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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