what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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What is short and yellow? Most Asians

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges can't talk therefore this is not a accurate accusation.

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Knock knock. Who's there? AV. AV who? Asshole vison. Now that's Amusement Vision. (Remembering Amusement Vision...)

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

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How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

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Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why did i try to write a funny joke? Cuz i was desperately bored.....

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

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What is white, black and blue all over? A zebra that was assaulted by Chuck Norris.

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An African American and an hispanic man are in a car, who's driving? No one, they are having sex

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Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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