Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

I'm tired of hearing Holocaust jokes, Anne Frankly I'm disappointed.

Q: What did the doctor say to the man with terminal cancer? A: You have terminal cancer.

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

Why did the woman shout at the bin? Because she is mentally ill

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...