how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What did the man say to the atractive woman? Hi

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yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

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Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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George W. Bush

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Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

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Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

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A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

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Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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