How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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Ruller

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Why did the boy get hit by a car? Because he didn't look both ways

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ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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Why couldn't the kid go into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13 and he was only 11!

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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What did the mountain biker say when he saw a double rainbow? This a very rare occurrence in nature, and I should enjoy this rare phenomenon.

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Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

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Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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