what color is blue? green

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

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What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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You're on fire.

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the boy get hit by a car? Because he didn't look both ways

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a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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