How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

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Netball.

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Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

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A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

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Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

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What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

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what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? A mexican is a human being while a bench is an inanimate object.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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What happened to the cat How should I know it's not my cat

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2 loaves of bread were in a bar they did nothing as they are inanimate objects

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops