What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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A black man goes to his dentist appointment and the doctor asks, have you brushed your teeth today laderius? the black man replies: Yes, but my name is not laderius

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-Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Willis. -Wills who? -IT'S ME WILLIS. YOUR SON! -Whatchu talking bout Willis, I ain't got no son. -Remember Bill, my father? I was conceived on your 20th birthday party. .... - Is he fat white Bill, Mexican Bill, or Billette the shemale? And thus, poor Willis jumps off a bridge, committing suicide, because his biological mother turns out to be a shemale screwing whore.

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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one of my friends died of heartburn today :( i cant believe gav is gone

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SEX

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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every cloud has a silver lining

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

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What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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What's red and the size of a packet of crisps? A Miscarriage

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two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

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A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

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yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

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What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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