What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

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What do you call Anne Franks life? A big game of hide and go seek.

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He lost his punch line. -by Ross

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If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

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How will the world end? That information is unknown

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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What the difference between a mexican family and a bench? The bench can support the family

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whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What do porn stars do after they retire? No clue but some idiot made a movie about it.

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops