Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

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A chicken crossed the road. It was run over before reaching the other side. by fast asleep

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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If life gives you lemonade.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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im not black, im Joseph Kony

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Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

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Why did the Olympic gold-medalist lose his faith in God? Because he began to feel that the the reasoning that most religions were based on was fairly spurious.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

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Barack Obama is a good president.

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, it hurts when i poke my leg like this!" The doctor says,"Mm yes, it seems you have taken an arrow to the knee. You'll never walk again."

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What would Ronald Reagan say if he was alive today? Nice to meet you my name is Ronald Reagan

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life is like a box of chocolates........no it's not

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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Where was the black child's dad? At work. He'll be back around 6:30

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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