What did the black man get his mom for Mother's Day? Some jewelry and a very nice card.

Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

What did the guy day to the other guy with an afro on his head? You look like a guy with an afro on his head.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

If you give a hobo a stick he might poke u with it

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple??? You... Lol jk no there could be alot of things like getting raped, the holocaust, me killing your children i mean someone killing your children. Because if it was me you would know it was me and file a report and i would be arrested and be sent to jail. And in jail i would try my hardest to stay alive brcause if i died that would suck. I would also try not to drop the soap beacuse i might get rapped by some prisib mate, also the floors are quite dirty and that would guve me any type of bacteirial infection like the stupid yeats infection or maby the persob who takes it from me when i finnish would get aids cause it dropped on the floor and who knows were it was. Then he would die from aids and his wife and or kids would be sad and set up a funeral were a preist would stand in akward silence cause the guy murderd the preists father so he wouldnt be mean an ruin the funeral but he wouldnt say anything nice. But after the funeral the preist would go back home and smoke a cigarette because he has started an unhealthy habbit just like millions of people around the world. When will people learn that it kills you faster than cancer well some cancers are quite quick and painless like a head tumor. But most tumors are able to be saved because the doctors are smart these days coming from yale or havord universitys and what not. Most peopel want to take the easy way out by just working at kinkos or wallmart. Both jobs are shit wich is why im probably going to go there cause no one else will except me in there offices or departments. I think its the fact i look like a pedofile trying to kill babys but you know how life is short and difficult to control but you have one life why waste it. Stupid emo kids trying to cut emselfs and shoot themselfs so they dont have to deal with theirs or their partners periods because the other day coming back from mc donalds this guy almost hit me with his car and threw a cup at me for some strange reason but hey not my problem unless he was my first victim?...... Lol jk i have never killed anyone and im not that creapy... Awks POTATO!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...