Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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What do you call a white guy with no friends? A white guy with no friends

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

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Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

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Yo mama so dumb, she studied for a blood test.

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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A man told this joke once... it wasn't funny.

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cory

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an ethopian thanksgiving

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

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way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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