Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

What do you say to a black guy who is holding a gun to your head? Nothing. He is holding a gun to your head.

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

Knock knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible...

There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

What is the difference between a pillow and a rock The rock could hert you.

Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

why did joe diragi cross the road there was food on the other side

What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...