Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

thumb_up thumb_down +2

when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Daniel is a fag

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the fat black man do? Get a gym membership.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

thumb_up thumb_down +2

it

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops