Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

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What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops