2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

Did you hear about the Polish submarine? It was one of five in the Polish Navy.

A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

Fat people

Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

A man in a car turned left at the end of his road. Then he proceeded .1 miles and turned left again, as his GPS instructed him.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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