What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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I said no! Its not funny... Maybe a little but stop it, I am having trouble enough finding out which comments are mine as it is.

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Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

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Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

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why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

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Q: Why was the cook put in jail. A: He has killed 2 people and robbed several stores

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What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

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Roses are red, Violets are too. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing infliction.

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What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

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Nero, I have 30 million dollars left, lets split them and leave ground zero behind us, I know it would make me happy to share them with you.

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

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Whats he difference between a rock and a dead baby? I'm not spemding the rest of my natural life in an insane asylum for eating a rock!

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what purple and jolly barney who doesnt love his charactorial warmth!# not weird

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Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

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One day, a guy wanted to know if all blondes really were dumb. He gathered a stadium full of blondes, picked one out of the blondes and said,"I will ask you a few questions. First, what is 23+12?" The blonde replied,"Uh, 30." The other blondes said,"Give her another chance!" "Alright. Next question. What is 30+30?" Said the inquirer. The blonde answered, "Oh! 300!" "Give her another chance!" The blonde crowd shouted. "Alright but this is the last question. What is 1+1?" The blonde answered, "2." The blonde crowd roared, "Give her another chance!"

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Q: What did the mute kid say to his mother ?

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What happen when a penguin walks into a bar? That is an almost impossible occasion. Penguins first of all waddle not walk and they only live in Antarctica and zoos, therefor they will not be able to enter one unless Antarctica becomes populated.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the farmer let him out, and he found a road to cross!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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