What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

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Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

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What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

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-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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Q. Whats Red and yellow and has braces? A.Pierre-Louis

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Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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