I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

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Do you want icecream, Björn?

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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I walk into a bar...

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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Why did the stereo break? Cause little Johnny threw a bat at it.

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

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Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal, and this wasn't just any road. It was the new highway built, with frequent traffic jams and a speed limit of 90 mph.

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why did the boy drop his bus because he was hit by an ice cream

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Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

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John's life hasn't been the same since committing suicide 13 years ago.

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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A man walks into an illegal brothel. He is a cop. He takes them back to the police station and questions them in a completely asexual manner.

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops