Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

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Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

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what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

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a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

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two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

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What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

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whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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What's worse than finding a band aid in your Crock-pot? Finding a Crock-pot in your band aid.

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

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why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

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Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

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Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops