I was walking down the street the other day And I pushed a child under a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

XD Thats what I was expecting from you, you do not go down without a bit of struggle and a tussle huh?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a Icelandic man? A guy who lives in a snowhouse with a elevator

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops