Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

Q /why do people eat dinner? A/ because their hungry

why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

want to hear a joke? then go ask someone else i dont know any.

Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

No!

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

Why did the money due? Because it fell out of the tree

What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

I used to get on Facebook, then someone asked me to save a child in Africa by liking a picture of Jesus or ignore it and go to hell

why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...