Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

pee

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Whats worse than passing out drunk and having your friends draw on your face? When you die of alcohol poisoning in the morning

Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

What did the crowd do when a lion walked into the bar? Got up and left because they realized the potential danger of the situation.

Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

Knock knock. Who's there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo beep beep.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

knock knock whos there i have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who Cream cheese

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. The chicken was run over by a truck before he could get to the other side

Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

How will the world end? That information is unknown

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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