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A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Who wants water? I do.

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A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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Link ate ink to make him sink.

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What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

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What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

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Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

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Roses are red Violets are blue Join the bro army! BROFIST! http://www.youtube.com/user/PewDiePie :D

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A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

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What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

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two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

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An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops