Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

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Me and a pig had sex, beastieality.

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You just read this ..

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Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Q. What did the father say to his son? A. Nothing, he just hit him with his belt. His wife tried to intervene, but she too was hit by said belt.

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A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

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What did the shark say to the boat captain? So do you prefer cards or pool?

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

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What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

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Q: What did the gun say to the person. A: Bang.

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Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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Knock Knock the door's open, come in

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your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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What do a cow girl and an orange have in common? They all are fruit, except for the cowgirl.

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops