Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

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What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

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What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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knock knock, whos there, isaac touch my titty

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What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

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School

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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-"Hey! You guys wanna hear a joke" -"What?" -"Womens Rights"

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Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops