What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

Jimmy wanted a bike for Christmas He got cancer instead.

the power to turn magnetism into light

What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

save me from the nothing ive become

How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, he is very fond of animals and would never want to shoot them.

Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

A bus full of retarded kids got broken on his way. One kid suggested to the bus driver that the problem could be with the brakes, as that kid's father was a mechanic.

A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

Penis Gabriel - Go eat some ice cream! Boner McDaniels - No. Penis Gabriel - Ok.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...