roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

Why was Mary's phone call suddenly disconnected? She was raped.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

Anthony sucks

what did one tornado say to the other? im dizzy

A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

A man walks into a convenient store and asks the cashier where the toilet paper is. She says aisle five. He goes down aisle five and there's no toilet paper.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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