Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

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What is brown and smells like bacon? Bacon

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what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

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What is as dry as a bone? A bone

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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who just made fun of katie matt

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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noodles

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How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

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What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What happened to the man who was raking leaves? He kept his yard clean and felt great about his hard work.

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45.

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Why did the Latino feel uncomfortable during anal, vaginal, and oral sex simultaneously? Because she was being raped by three men.

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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